Hierarchy of Urgency

Which one gets top priority:  critical?  urgent?  ASAP?  Immediately?  And what if there's a bunch of exclamation points?  Do you handle plain old "ASAP" before you get to "ASAP!!"?  Then what about ASAP!!! or ASAP!!!!?  If ASAP means "as soon as possible", what if it's not possible because you're working on something that's "needed yesterday"?  And if it's needed yesterday and yesterday is gone, does that mean it's no longer needed?

For more "heckuva rush" cartoons, click here.