Try Plotting at a Smaller Scale

If only it was this easy!  It reminds me of the carpenter who cut twice and it was still too short.

...and the related story my dad used to tell of the new guy on the construction crew who cuts the board too short so his boss sends him to the superintendent to ask for a "board stretcher".

...or the electrician who instructs his apprentice to "wipe up the voltage drops".

...or the engineer who's told his design is an ID 10 T solution.

...or the new attorney who's sent to fetch a stack of "verbal agreement forms".

May 2016 Wright News

I Need Expert Advice

Like the old saying goes, you don't have to be crazy to be in this industry, but it helps.
I feel like I can relate to this guy - especially when I'm in Lowes or Home Depot (my favorite stores) browsing for seemingly unrelated parts for some creative new home improvement project (one of my favorite things to do).   Once, and only once, I made the mistake of trying to explain to a helpful Lowes employee what I was doing.  "So you're gonna take this electrical conduit and pound the ends flat and bolt it to this thing and use it as a what?" The more I tried to explain, the more perplexed he became.  It didn't take me long to realize that whenever anyone asks me if I need help, the best course of action is to quickly say, "Nope, I'm good thanks", and then go back to talking to myself.
For another cartoon relating to the mental health of design professionals, click here.

Too Much Stress

After a lifetime in the construction industry, both as a structural engineer and as a builder, I've learned that there's always more than one way to solve a problem - and often the builder has the better idea. 
...but I'm not so sure about this guy.
Other brilliant things I've learned:  measure twice, cut once; the north arrow does not mean "this side up"; the boss may not always be right, but the boss is always the boss; treat people how you want to be treated; and all's well that ends.

You Think These Things Grow on Trees?

From the time I was about age 11, I spent a good part of summer vacations at the construction site building houses with my dad who had a small construction company.  One day we were framing a house and had just nailed down the plywood over the floor framing.  Dad told me to go down and throw up some studs so we could start framing the walls.  After waiting a few minutes and no studs, he walked over to the edge to see what was the hold-up.  As soon as he appeared over the edge of the house, I bent over and began retching and heaving loudly as if I was trying to vomit.  Finally I looked up and said, "Dad, I've tried and tried but I just can't 'throw up' any studs".  We had a good laugh, and then it was back to work.
Unlike this guy, we never had a crane to lift our trusses.  Instead, we hefted them up by hand one at a time.  It was always a relief when the roof trusses were all safely standing in place.

Big Enough Fer The Both of Us

If only they'd built those old west towns a bit bigger, there might have been a lot fewer gunfights. 

I can see it now:  Two rough characters square off at twenty paces in the middle of town wearing tool belts and slinging nail guns.  "This here town just ain't big enough fer the both of us", one would say, "so me 'n my gang'll start buildin' over there and you'n yer gang c'n build over here." 

February 2016 Wright eNews

Jedi Construction Tricks

I guess you can't blame this guy for trying.  The inspector's probably thinking to himself, "You think you're some kind of Jedi, waving your hand around like that? I'm an inspector.  Mind tricks don't work on me.  Only right. No right, no pass!"

Sometimes we humble engineers are asked to work some Jedi magic, like when we get an urgent phone call from the jobsite with the superintendent on the other end saying, "We accidentally forgot to put any rebar in the footings and walls and now the inspector won't pass us.  Can you just get me a letter for that?" 

For more cartoons with inspectors and "...can you get me a letter" click here.

January 2016 Wright eNews